Tuesday, June 22, 2010

the dog's lost the leash

this sounds horrible, but sometimes i'm overwhelmed by my own creativity. it's too much for my brain. forming the creations that lie in wait in my head and keeping track of them or worrying about them or deciding which comes first and how things fall on the priority list of my life. OCD, perfectionism, manias, dissatisfaction. i guess i'm not moody in general, but while i'm working on some particuarly creative project i suppose i tend to be so. this week, having finally gotten Bernie 2 and Buckeye Jim out of my head and onto the computer as a finished youtube product (that makes it sound so cheap, ha) i was so happy. i literally woke up happy on monday morning. strangest thing. and when I work on stuff like that, and really get rolling, I can't stop unless outside forces interfere. I haven't eaten during the day for three days because I've been dedicated to editing (I eat at night once I've been kicked out of the lab). And then I go a bit mad and grumpy once it's all over. I tend to go over the projects once they're finished, over and over thinking about things I could have done differently if I had the chance, or, alternately, singing my own paens (this goes for writing projects, too). Either way, I certainly get worked up.

I'm still not sure if I'm the lonely artist type or not.

No comments: