This morning, for the first time in... a long time, I got up at 5AM after a good six-hour sleep. Incredible. And I got up even before my alarm. Quite stunning, quite stunning indeed.
I know I'll probably be dragging a bit today, despite the hot coffee that I am about to consume (out of my I Heart NY mug), but I seem to drag a bit every day anyway. Today I'm starting a very part-time position, aid (or shadow) for this kid named Lee at a private Christian school. It's in Camarillo, which is about a twenty minute drive from here, but it beats Santa Barbara, which is a 50 minute drive, usually. The drawback being that I have to get up much earlier than I've been used to as a deadbeat unemployed kid, and that there is some sort of dress code. I haven't been able to figure out what that code is, though, and thus I am trying to cover all of my bases this morning by wearing my one nice pair of slacks and an oversized yet stylish and sparkly black sweater thing with traces of a weird green scarf that I wear with everything, though it's not really a scarf... more like a limp, decorative scarf wanna-be, but it certainly makes everything I wear seem a tad bit artsy. Yes, I am a stylish, artsy creature!
Anyway, I only work until about 12, after which I think I'll come back home, make an egg sandwich, and get back to writing. I did a good deal of outlining on a new old story on Monday, but yesterday was an anxiety-ridden, sleepy day that concluded with me sneezing myself silly while watching all of the new shows on Fox (Glee, Raising Hope, Running Wilde), which were not that good.
Lately I've been waking up to Paul McCartney's "Another Day" from his Ram On album, which is one of the best albums ever put together, in my opinion, and ultimately tops all of the other ex-Beatles's post-Beatles careers (strange yes, I always preferred George overall, but this album is just so GOOD). Anyway, this song is so wonderful, and it makes me very happy to move along with the mundanity (is that a word?) of life while being satisfied by the validation of sadness.
So Sad, So Sad,
Sometimes She Feels So Sad.
Alone In Her Apartment She'd Dwell,
Till The Man Of Her Dreams Comes To Break The Spell.
Ah, Stay, Don't Stand Her Up
And He Comes And He Stays
But He Leaves The Next Day,
I think that's so good-- not that this woman is necessarily waiting around for a MAN to help her out of it, but just something, any kind of a change to get her away from this monotony, but "he comes, and he stays, but he leaves the next day." That line just kills me for some reason. Also:
As She Posts Another Letter To The Sound Of Five,
People Gather 'Round Her
And She Finds It Hard To Stay Alive
At the same time, he's singing about her in an upbeat sort of way, which I don't feel is supposed to be ironic at all. This is life, there IS something to getting up, slipping into stockings, stepping
into shoes. It's just another day, and there's nothing really wrong with that.
On that note, I have so much anxiety about accomplishing things these days. I really need to do something wonderful.
Preferrably before I turn 23, my god.